What I Wish I Knew Before DATING A GERMAN

Wanted Adventure
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My German husband and I have been together for almost 9 years now! So as an American, here are a few things I wish I had known about Germany and Germans in general before I started dating a German.
So my question for you is: What is your take on these things? And what’s been your experience with this in your own life?
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8 Nov 2017

GermanGermanyGermansDeutschDeutschlanddatingdating Germansdating in GermanyAmerican in GermanyAmerican datingAmericanMr. German ManAmerican in Europecultureculture Germanyculture Americaculture USAUSAAmericaAmerica vs. GermanyGermany versus USAculture differencesrelationshipsliving abroadWanted AdventureDana Newman



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Kale Ling
Kale Ling Vor year
That happiness tier in the outtakes was a perfect way to describe your differences.
David Roche
David Roche Vor 26 Tage
Jan Kostka most American would find this young lady as a Histrionic personality disorder...Depends on what part of America you live can depend on how direct you will be. Eastern U.S. and especially a New Yorker can be very direct. This is not the case in the west (California). Most American find this directness as rude..Interesting enough, the British would find this lower-class. Many American's finds smiling or making conversation with a stranger no big deal. It's being polite and idle chit-chat...So if a German wants to sit in a corner and pick their nose, so be it..It would be equally irritating to friendly American's.....Not many American's would put up with this lady..Sooner or later they would roll their eyes and walk away.lol...she is sweet...but chatty.
Jan Kostka
Jan Kostka Vor 26 Tage
With this you only create prejudices in germany against Americans.
Jan Kostka
Jan Kostka Vor 26 Tage
+David Roche I think you showed that you are an ignorant and uneducated american.
David Roche
David Roche Vor 28 Tage
+Christian 86 I was going to say something but it's Christmas and I rather not take the bait, Hansel.
Christian 86
Christian 86 Vor Monat
+David Roche you are a very educated boy, aren't you?
Linda Raterink
We in the Netherlands have a saying "No news is good news." Meaning if you don't hear anything about what ever it is you doing, it is not illegal or you're doing a fantastic job. I guess that goes for Germans aswel.
Julian Z
Julian Z Vor Tag
wieso bist du jedezeit so geil drauf, wie schaffst du das ?
David Holt
David Holt Vor 2 Tage
Possibly it is Americans who are totally crazy and "out there", whereas Germans are mostly sane?
Hädicke Daniel
Hädicke Daniel Vor 3 Tage
U know some of ur cars have nice colours, and i like they have wheels, but if i have to critizice smth is that they r trash. On Amerika i like that its big and that they have trees and birds, and if ur lucky u can see some domesticated blacks in some Hollywood movies, and sometimes even as president, and some free living in the slums beeing provided with drugs from the white, and if u like shooting around u can be shure that when u join the army u have within a year a war u can take part( and if it takes a bit longer u still have the highschools) but if i have to critizice smth about it its that u didnt manage to convince ( even with the help of our government) other people here in Germany too that u r a great nation.
Michael Buckland
Michael Buckland Vor 3 Tage
Not everyone is 5 years old, but apparently you are not aare of this
helfgott david
helfgott david Vor 3 Tage
Dear Dana i do think a lot of germans would like to know about the amazon reactions in germany about your book. To me it prooves of a brilliant brain,nobody can deny that fact,a strong will to learn about germany and the language. I would like to express my deepest respect. And i would like to thank you
David Zimmermann
David Zimmermann Vor 4 Tage
Wow, I didn't know it was possible to smile so much while talking at the same time - quite amazing! :)
DP - Didi PIRONI Vor 5 Tage
In Bavaria we have a phrase that could fit to your diagnosis of the lack of emotions: "Nix g´sagt is g´lobt gnua". In German: "Nichts zu sagen ist genug des Lobes". In English: "To say nothing is enough of praise ..." It´s somehow true.
Philip Cavieve
Philip Cavieve Vor 6 Tage
Am looking for serious relationship am in Germany
So I would be like: " You are a bit weird in the way you talk, but I like the color of your shirt ?"
Horst Neumohr
Horst Neumohr Vor 6 Tage
Allen Dingen, die du am Anfang erzählt hast, könnte ich ganz gut zustimmen. Doch die Sache mit den Versicherungen finde ich etwas befremdlich. In meinem Bekanntenkreis spricht kein Mensch über Versicherungen. Manche haben vermutlich mehrere, doch die meisten haben nur die allernötigsten und würden nicht im Traum daran denken, mit anderen über Versicherungen zu reden, wenn die sie nicht darauf ansprechen. - Was mich selbst höchst irritiert ist, wenn Leute schon bei den geringsten Kleinigkeiten in euphorische Bergriffe abgleiten. Doch einer prägt sich auch damit ja fast täglich ins Weltbewusstsein ein, nämlich der vermutlich dümmste amerikanische Präsident aller Zeiten, stupid Donald. Dieser Primitivling ergießt sich ja bei jeder passenden oder unpassenden Gelegenheit und schon bei Banalitäten in Superlativen. Ich dachte zuerst, das sei einfach ein besonderes Merkmal seines kindlichen und unterentwickelten Charakters. Doch wenn das in Amerika so üblich ist, dann wundert es mich natürlich nicht, dass der auch heute noch etwa 40% der einfachen Landbevölkerung hinter sich hat. - Doch davon abgesehen Dana, du bist, ohne dass ich dafür ein Superlativ bemühen muss, meine liebste Amerikanerin, gewissermaßen das liebenswerteste netteste freundlichste und intelligenteste Gegenstück zum bekloppten Präsidenten. Deine Videos anzusehen, bereitet mir immer viel Freude. Mach weiter so.
Torsten Clauß
Torsten Clauß Vor 6 Tage
or as we Germans in the south say, ned geschempft ischt gnug globt, nicht geschimpft ist genug gelobt, not complained is praised enough
Armin Vor 6 Tage
Well, if everything is amazing then nothing is amazing. In this matter the (generally spoken) typical american reminds me of a quote of Homer Simpson: "This really amazes me. And I'm not easily impressed.... wow a blue car!"
DsRathore Rathore
kat gardner
kat gardner Vor 7 Tage
Germans are direct and honest but that's perfect. I hate the way you never know what Americans are thinking because they seldom say.
MattiMieze Vor 7 Tage
Heii. First of all, I looove your videos :) Actually it's the exact same opposite with me and my american boyfriend. I am always suuper excited about everything and he is more serious and he is really direct haha. I feel more american right now haha but in general you are right haha
Mei Uzumaki
Mei Uzumaki Vor 8 Tage
Kann die mal aufhören ein auf Profi zu machen?!
James Sager
James Sager Vor 9 Tage
James Black
James Black Vor 10 Tage
You can not generalize a nation based on just "one" individual relationship
Un Wichtig
Un Wichtig Vor 10 Tage
I'm German and I consider people talking about insurance all the time as boring and not as German.
bilder familie
bilder familie Vor 11 Tage
Lo this is a funny video. I think except of the insurence thing ( i m german as well but can not see any truth in that) she is basically discriping male vs femal. Not german vs. American ☺
VosQuiTransitis Vor 11 Tage
The concept of criticism you talked about is also teached in Germany, at least in my school. Mostly results into 'You made a nice PowerPoint presentation' though 😂
S.L. George
S.L. George Vor 11 Tage
a lot of this is the difference between how men and women express themselves as opposed to cultural differences. Virtually no American guy would ever say, "it's super, super, super amazing" lol However, I do think it is true that Americans tend to be more expressive and less direct than Germans. Having said that, the Germans impression of our expressiveness is totally off base. They tend to perceive this as being phony--this is not the case. Some Americans are phony, but the level of expressiveness is not indicative of that. Among many other things about Germany and Germans, I actually like the directness of Germans, especially in business. However, sometimes they are so abrupt and 'short' that it is perceived as rudeness.
The Right Wing Archives
The thumbnail looks like you're flabbergasted by his giant German sausage
amina kluth
amina kluth Vor 12 Tage
I also learned this technique in my school here in Cologne . But you're totally right, we are quite directly in our everyday life. 😄😂
Tr3f4cegamer Vor 12 Tage
Germans tend to spontaneously taking a shortcut through their neighbours frontyard
Andreas Kruber
Andreas Kruber Vor 12 Tage
In Germany we have the national social insurance system which we call “Sozialversicherung”. Every tax payer pays aside the taxes automatically in these six pots of the social insurances. Barack Obama tried that kind of system with “Obamacare” too which was called “socialism” by some right wingers. We were the first country in the world that had that system. It was developed and introduced between 1883-1889 by Otto Von Bismarck. The idea was that the community was helping the individual person if necessary. Maybe they were talking about that or some additional insurances. But honestly, I never witnessed that type of conversation or was part of it.
helfgott david
helfgott david Vor 15 Tage
Dear Dana what do YOU think is the most difference between germany and the us?
Dämonen Sultan
Dämonen Sultan Vor 15 Tage
Ich weiß das diesses Video schon älter ist aber das ist mir erst mal egal... Was ich sagen wollte ist das nicht alle Deutschen so direkt und diese Methode erst positive Punkte zu finden bevor man die negativen sagt auch in deutschen Schulen praktiziert wird MFG aus Deutschland Tim
Josy Kapunkt
Josy Kapunkt Vor 16 Tage
Your Mr. German is one of not many people who likes to talk about insurances.. @Every people from other countries: Germans don't talk about insurances all the time! 😂 I'm German and dating a British guy since a few weeks and I know something that he told me about German dating. In England (don't know if it's same in America) "bringing someone home" or specially boys bringing girls home is polite and kind of gentle but in Germany it's often used as an alibi for having sex or wanting to have sex with your date and if he's/she's okey with bringing her/him home you can expect that your date wants to sleep with you too 😄
Pretty Stone
Pretty Stone Vor 16 Tage
They also teach this at German schools but in normal conversations being real is being better than trying to make the truth look better.
Pretty Stone
Pretty Stone Vor 16 Tage
You are so ugly and stupid
Huckleberry Hawke
Huckleberry Hawke Vor 16 Tage
Wow du bist unglaublich symphatisch
Garage928 Vor 14 Tage
Huckleberry Hawke schleim schleim..
Björn Gerlach
Björn Gerlach Vor 17 Tage
Way too much energy here...
Linda Silver
Linda Silver Vor 17 Tage
That about the insurance is BULLSHIT!!!!!!! 😂😂😂😂😂
Der Simur
Der Simur Vor 18 Tage
I do not know anyone here in Germany who likes to talk about insurance. Except when he can save a lot. We also think that insurance is a necessary evil.
Der Simur
Der Simur Vor 18 Tage
To the first thing. I learnd from a american man: everything before the word "but" is bullshit.
Michael Krämer
Michael Krämer Vor 20 Tage
Schade, daß wir uns nie vorher kennengelernt haben...Daumen hoch.
Khalifah Dahir
Khalifah Dahir Vor 20 Tage
Es ist nicht leicht, eine bescheidene Person zu bekommen, aber ich denke, deutsche Mädchen sind schwer zu verstehen, aber ich weiß nicht warum.
Jack Browni
Jack Browni Vor 20 Tage
The insurance thing is for over 30 guys who are pretty boring in general
Jon Snow
Jon Snow Vor 22 Tage
Gosh americans talk your ears off without much substance. Small talk is killing me.
Mystery Grl
Mystery Grl Vor 23 Tage
Wer spricht bitte gerne über Versicherungen?😂
Arved Ludwig
Arved Ludwig Vor 23 Tage
The word "Tja" is the perfect description of our mindset.
fx shrat
fx shrat Vor 23 Tage
I would definitely insure your cuteness. Other than that I don't care much for insurances. Maybe your friend is special case for a doctor.
Michael N
Michael N Vor 24 Tage
Thumbs down for this commercial line up. A shame.
Russian Bot Ulf
Russian Bot Ulf Vor 24 Tage
theres pros and cons to both behaviours, your kids are lucky
0nem1leh1gh Vor 25 Tage
In my opinion it is not important to align at any price, because it is not the idea of love being a copy or a twin.
Jan Kostka
Jan Kostka Vor 26 Tage
When I was in school they said we should try to say something nice but when there are 30 pupils in a class there´s a limit what you can say nice about something. But we germans are also taught to take critique and aren´t so affected by it.
Feuerversteck Flammende Feuerkogel
Well,as a german potato,I want to tell something about how direct Germans are. We lern to buff our criticism in the school, but many ignore that,because it's not so clear.
Feuerversteck Flammende Feuerkogel
*to unstand what we criticizi.
helfgott david
helfgott david Vor 27 Tage
Dear Dana see that was exactly my problem when i first saw your videos. Everything was soooooo amazing and great....nono dont get me wrong i got your point NOW. To me as a german it was too much to be true.So i did not trust you. NOW i understand , and i am sorry for this missunderstanding.Its just not a german thing, OK?
Bastian Ziegert
Bastian Ziegert Vor 27 Tage
It is so 😂 the Germans 😂😂😂😂
Cristi Jayo
Cristi Jayo Vor 29 Tage
You forgot to add: German men pee sitting down 😉 And when something is fun, they say it’s “funny” hehe
Chantue Vor Monat
Ich spreche nie über Versicherungen und meine Freunde auch nicht 😂😂😂
Soo Bell
Soo Bell Vor Monat
German are direct and straight forward and that is very refreshing in America. I can feel their inner strength , confident and boldness. I like German sensibility. Why American are over exaggerating ? ...... smile lots ? And always sound happy ? American have been trained since they were very young that how to be popular and to be loved . But they are not realized that they are overdoing. That why American are often being perceived as fake or not natural. And you can sense their insecurity. We , American have to learn the beauty of " the less is more ".
Debra Tillman
Debra Tillman Vor Monat
During my travels, I noticed there is a big difference in "sense of humor" when contrasted with American humor. What's your take on this difference?
Pippo Freygeist
Pippo Freygeist Vor Monat
The question, i am asking to me in an amercian/german marriage: Do american wifes also leave the family home in Germany? tiny supplement: 20 Euros for a fan- shirt sounds pretty fair and reasonable. "What!? Who said expensive?!
i Shah
i Shah Vor Monat
You beat around the bush a LOT. I mean ALOT ALOT
Ashkan Alikhanzadeh
I just want some amazing ice cream now 😢
Easy S.
Easy S. Vor Monat
That’s exiting.... amazing! Greetings from Germany 🇩🇪 😂
Apneistefou Vor Monat
US has become soft. That's why you (US) can't handle direct messages.
Undercover Hamster
You really need to calm down!!! When he's at 'OK' you're at 'Orgasmic'!!!
Undercover Hamster
Calm down!!!
vvv Vor Monat
I'm Franco-German and I can't listen to this video any longer, sorry, it's very interesting but it's too much excitement exaggeration and high pitched voice and it's tiring. Probably I could handle an English speaker. It's like listening to a Comedian in a show and I suppose that's one of the carasteritics of the Americans that Europeans find weird. It doesn't sound genuine in our ears but I'm sure it is, that's what causes misunderstandings I suppose. I'm a woman myself and I think I couldn't live even with someone like this , that's why I opted for a very quite Norwegian ! :o) I think I would get high blood pressure living with an extravert American !
Lynn Müller
Lynn Müller Vor Monat
You really hit the nail on the head on all points...I was married to a German man for three years and these points you mentioned made me feel totally lonely and isolated from him...and He always reacted to my exuberance as if I was being "agressive" which in German means more like angry...He would even interpret my loud expressive complaining about some random problem that I had with my job as somehow being angry with him! I had to constantly explain that my exuberance has none of those meanings LOL
Asad Rizwan
Asad Rizwan Vor Monat
The way you describe you boyfriend, I'm more German than American. AND I'M A NATURAL BORN CITIZEN OF THE UNITED STATES!!!
Yves Gysel
Yves Gysel Vor Monat
As a Belgian, I have also family in Germany. It dependance also were in Germany. In general they are more straight to the Point, but some are not. Like in smaller villages. We in Belgium also do not use words as amazing, great so often. We are more reserved, when it comes to critizise a person. I have lived and worked for 2 years in San Francisco. At that time, I was dating An American girl, but I did not wanted to stay in the USA. So I came back to Belgium. Sorry Kate, it really had nothing to do with you. I really loved you a lot, even when I said I did not, when we broke up. I just did not wanted you go give every thing up and follow me to Belgium
Vandana Alemagar
Alice Wilde
Alice Wilde Vor 2 Monate
This isn't unique to Germans everybody outside US is like this. It's Americans that are weird.
Alice Wilde
Alice Wilde Vor 2 Monate
I can't work out whether her teeth are real or not.
Christian Gyamfi
Christian Gyamfi Vor 2 Monate
I actually believe that not all cases need direct approach and at the same time not all cases need massaging and emotional approach. There should be a balance depending on the situation at hand.
Willy Octavianus
Willy Octavianus Vor 2 Monate
4:11 !! . totally! that's perfect! i am dying etc etc etc. south canadians...
Smug Smugly
Smug Smugly Vor 2 Monate
You know what they say about red heads.....
Martina T.
Martina T. Vor 2 Monate
The video and comment section is spot on describing German, imagine, a German is married to a Japanese .... I try to get better but if you grew up in Germany, it is hard to find that you are very mmmmh. ......
Eliza Ivanova
Eliza Ivanova Vor 2 Monate
Also, he's a man. How about a list "Things I would like to know about men when I started dating", would be pretty much the same. Or at least most European men.
Carrie Davis
Carrie Davis Vor 2 Monate
My German boyfriend says not complaining is as good as a compliment because we know they did try to find something to complain about lol
Thalia Davies
Thalia Davies Vor 2 Monate
You are the most abrasive American I’ve come across yet.
ABOE by Marga
ABOE by Marga Vor 2 Monate
ah ah!! I am married to a German also, living in Germany and totally agree with your points, just the insurance not :P my husband or his friends dodn't talk a lot about insurances but he wants to have all the possible insurances. I guess it has to do with the culture of "expecting ahead the worst" :P
Perfectly Imperfekt
Perfectly Imperfekt Vor 2 Monate
You sensitive? Then heck. Just thank them for directness. I prefer this type of people. Atleast they are not two faced. But then the lack of emotion is pretty cold. Americans are known for being loud in England. Lol. Everyone can hear them talk in the train. Lol. Not good.
Anna Khan
Anna Khan Vor 2 Monate
subscribe me
Jasmin Vor 2 Monate
The first point is not true, Germans learn the same thing.. first some positive stuff and then the negative things
DollyBear X
DollyBear X Vor 2 Monate
Wtf is up with the audio
猫だよ Vor 2 Monate
2:39 lol
DSP16569 Vor 3 Monate
Same like "I Love you" in german vs US ;-) - In German only used for People we would die for, in the US for everybody they maybe like ;-)
Lynn Abunai
Lynn Abunai Vor 3 Monate
New Yorkers and Germans are perfect matches
Steven Homan
Steven Homan Vor 3 Monate
you were more than likely taught to react in a non confrontational female way. men aren't like this. Americans also exaggerate and introduce verbal inflation into their language use. insurance is a practical consideration, not an emotional one.
Little Girl
Little Girl Vor 3 Monate
1:20. I learned that in school too. And I’m German.
Mary Baaldaan
Mary Baaldaan Vor 3 Monate
Lol, I’m a german kid and I got told in school, that you should always name a good thing first too... I think it’s often because many Germans don’t like to „play around“ , they just say things directly, because they don’t see a sense in spinning around the truth
NEXIS981 Vor 3 Monate
Als Deutscher empfände ich es als unmutig oder charakterschwach, wenn mir jemand nicht direkt sagt daß bei mir "was falsch läuft". Es käme mir vor als traut er/sie sich nicht, mir etwas direkt zu sagen. -> Soll jetzt nicht heißen daß ich euch Amerikaner für charakterschwach und unmutig halte! Ich verstehe ja auch warum ihr es so macht :) Ihr wollt jemanden erst belobigen bevor ihr ihm eine Kritik ins Gesicht knallt. Quasi etwas aufbauendes sagen, bevor man etwas abbauendes sagt. Ich denke wir deutschen sind so, weil wir nach dem Kredo leben: "Nur durch Fehler lernt man". Daher möchten wir wahrscheinlich direkt wissen/sagen was falsch läuft :) Die aufbauenden Komplimente über das was gut läuft dürfen aber gerne hinterher kommen ^^ Das sind eben die kulturellen Unterschiede. Wäre ja langweilig wenn wir alle gleich wären ;D *Daumen hoch*
Lisa M Hernandez
Lisa M Hernandez Vor 3 Monate
Make a video on what kind of insurances don't exist in America :)
Sherry Caraway
Sherry Caraway Vor 3 Monate
It's annoying to watch you. You speak in an exaggerated way, like you are shouting instead of speaking. Your mouth movements are too exaggerated too. Your arms flailing around with your shouting and mouth movements are so very annoying. Why can't you just speak in a normal calm conversational tone? I have to stop watching since you are soo shouty and annoying. You are yet one more person who thinks their incoherent ramblings are so interesting you deserve to enlighten the world with your boring bullshit.
Schubert Jörg
Schubert Jörg Vor 3 Monate
So Frollein. Denn übe ich jetzt mal Kritik auf amerikanisch: Du bist ja wirklich wunderschön und dein Englisch ist so klar, dass ich es auch größtenteils ohne Untertitel verstehe. Aber: Dein Herumgefuchtel mit den Armen g e h t m i r a u f d e n SACK!!! Ich hab's versucht, klappte nicht ganz. Denn es geht mir wirklich tierisch auf die Nerven. Willst du Fliegen verscheuchen oder was soll das? Wiss frändlie grietings Jörg
Jo Hennes
Jo Hennes Vor 3 Monate
I guess you characterized us Germans pretty well. About the first point I hafta say that there are many fellow countrymen who handle things like this: telling directly what all the fuss is about. It stil is a question of character (and maybe also education) if they will adress it it you immediately. I also know many guys who would never do it that way. Thanks anyway, it's a pretty interesting summary about us from an "outsider"!
Verbal Ästhet
Verbal Ästhet Vor 3 Monate
That insurance thing at the end seems to be just a topic of interest of that group of your friends. But the other points seem totally normal for Germans. I'd say the rest is typical German culture.
Dave Ankeny
Dave Ankeny Vor 3 Monate
Most Germans tend to think most Americans are pretty fake with their reactions.
Jack Currence
Jack Currence Vor 3 Monate
You've mentioned the insurance thing before, and I have to admit that it kind of cracks me up. As an American, I tend to share your view of the concept (necessary, but nothing to get excited about), so hearing that it is fascinating to your husband and some of his friends is somewhat odd.
Shelley May
Shelley May Vor 3 Monate
I really want to know what kinds of insurance they were discussing.
Anita Radmanic
Anita Radmanic Vor 3 Monate
The direct thing... That's why Americans are such snowflakes -.-"
ACLG Vor 3 Monate
i know our pee pee’s are smol.
Mou Chowdhury
Mou Chowdhury Vor 4 Monate
First of all they have this huge fetish for poop
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